I'm suffering from the same old symptoms.
Is it just me or are you suffering too?
Do you like it, because I know I do....


(:

I've got new glasses. Love it. (:
It's like my old goggles except it's much cuter because I don't look as geeky as I used to.
Ummm. Duh, because previously... I used to wear braces and I looked horrible then.

Anyway...........

If you haven't already realised, I've starting using more vulgarities than usual. Something must be wrong with me because I'm usually not that vulgar. I need to stop before it becomes a habit.

Strangely, I actually asked beng to teach me some hokkien words.


Seriously, what is wrong with me?


I zoned out way too many times this week.
Then, I met Mr. Irrinoying. (I seem to bump into him almost everyday.)
Then, last weekend, the vase decided to fall. If I wasn't sitting down, then I would have died.
Now the flowers are gone. )):


Oh well, there are other things to be happy about. Like for example, UT is over. Well, not. UGHHHHHHHH! We have cognitive retest because of the stupid technical errors! ):
That's so unfortunate for us isn't it?
Must have been because of Gilbert. D:


Okay. So maybe not, but I'm still happy about other things. (:
Like how Xiao Jie found her wallet & how Nikki managed to find her phone. :D
&& how I managed to find my adapter too. HAHA.


I know that the kranji people won't know who is who. So, I'll webcam with them once school reopens so you know! :D



i miss the midgets & savanca. ):

Holidays already!!!!! Camp's on Tuesday.

What did I do?
I just sat there, shut the fuck up and you shouted at me?!
Fuck. I never did anything wrong and I havent even been home the past few days to have any healthy interaction with the rest of you and bloody hell. This is what I fucking get?!


CCB.
This is why I hate going home.

I can't wait for camp. 3 days of freedom.


Fuck. Tmr got some CCC thingy with parents.
CCB.
I never say I want them to go. Don't assume. I said I want you to come instead of him. Not the same as YOU must go..
They write HOPE. Not the same as MUST.
English fail is it? Oh wait, I forgot. They did fail their English.



Not my fault la.
I take one look at the dumb shit letter and I know it's pointless.
CCB.




Irritating sia.


):

Dear broken heart,
Was this the path that we always wanted to go? Because right now I feel so lost.


My nightmare isn't over at all.
I saw some of them, tried being friendly and all but sometimes I'm so stupid because I just can't do it.

Then on Monday night, I saw Saiful. A lot of wonderful childhood memories came flooding back to me. I wanted to say Hi but I was too shy and we all know that I definitely won't ask him how he's doing. Instead I'll ask about someone else. (I saw his mom the other day.)
HAHA. They're bffs. What can I do?
Gawd. I miss them. I really do.


Then, met Zane, who happens to be Hanis' friend. Cool right? Haha.
Zane from my primary school. That one.



Sigh, meeting the class on Friday because of ZX. No money for his bday present because I'm buying Nigel & Pan Zi's cake first.


Btw. Kelvin & Pan Zi are my bff...

Tell me little dolly, why are you so scared?

Guess I'm over it.
Thank you.






I'm thinking of moving back to LJ.
I want. I need.
Privacy.


I'll post my occasional rubbish here though.

Do you think I'll make it out of this 22nd alive?

School. School. School.


Rubbish = rubbish.


Cheer training tomorrow. Fuck. Lazy. Shit. UT.
Heard that I must do a lot of pumpings and everything. Confirm my fat ass cannot take it. ):
Stretching, cardio, crunches. Tones up my body. Within weeks, I'll look good in a bikini.


There's school tmr. It's like midnight already.
Go to sleep?
Nah, I can't. Something is keeping me awake.
Not nightmares. -.-'''
Definitely not from Elm Street. Haha.


Anyway, I've got good news for myself. (:
Which also means bad news for myself because I'll be stuck with uhh... Ahem. Yeah. The class knows.


UT tmr. Not studying.
Seniors said nothing to study, so not studying. :D
Haha. :D

The hugest argument a week ago. ):
And that's when it all began...
If only it had not happened.



I'm sitting at home bored and everything because I pon school today. Listening to all the painfully beautiful songs playing on the blog as I stare at my computer screen and keyboard.

And thus, I continue to emo. ):




Don't want to go to school because I was late. Don't want to leave my house cause it will trigger back all those memories.

I'm too tired and too sick of entertaining all of them thoughts. If this goes on, I'll probably die of exhaustion.

I'm like those kids from Nightmare on Elm Street. Except, I'm not terrified of Freddy. I'm terrified of you. Funny, you won't kill me in my sleep but... You'll.... You'll scare everything out of me.



Sigh. Leaving for town at around 1pm. Slack, eat & then head off to meet Val(maybe). And maybe go to JP.


My hair's been having bad hair days all week. ):
Funny roots. Funny hair.
I think I need to get clarifying shampoo because of my roots. ):
No purple hair anytime soon. ):




Anyway, my eye candy is in school today & I'm not. Arghhh. Nvm. Nvm.
There's always tmr, Wednesday & the rest of the stupid week.
Anyway, hope I don't meet him on the streets today.

Fourth week of school is over and done with.


There's around 12 weeks until semester break and 2 weeks until the short vacation. Oh how fast time seems to fly. I never thought that poly life would fly this fast. I still cannot decide if it's good or bad because there's too many things to think about. Like, my eyecandy etc.




Anyway, in case you wanted to know.
RP is not helping me change my bad habit of coming to school late. I've been late for almost an entire week already. Do you know?
I was late almost everyday this week. The only day I was not late was the day I pon school and came after school. I was actually late for Maths but I'm lucky that my faci didn't really notice that I was super late. That's just how late I am. And btw, my class is predicting that I'll confirm be late and will reach class at 8.45am. Yeah, you see. (:
I'm always late. Sigh.



This week has been pretty crazy. With the auditions & me blacking out.
I didn't make it, if that's what you wanted to know. OH well. The competition's just too good. And I know I sucked right from the start. So, what else do you want to know?



And yes, I did black out.
It so happened that I decided to pon cheer training on Wednesday. When I got home, after showering & everything... I just fainted on my bed. Did not even complete my RJ. Gilbert's bound to give me a D or F but do I look like I care? No.
Yeah. Back to the fainting.
I guess it's because I did over work my body for the past few days and yes, I was dehydrated so that's why...
Well, at least... I didn't cough out blood. Even if I did, bet you wouldn't have rushed by my side. Instead you'll just watch as I cough and choke on my own blood and die.
*watches the scene*
Eh, it's actually quite a nice scene. Dying because you choked on your blood.



And then, there was drama.
My name is now Kissmelah Gila. Diva wanted to give me some Anastacia name but I disliked it so he wanted to call me Kisstina Aguilera but I decided to change it to Kissmelah Gila!
Thank you ah Tail Feather Neutron! That's Diva's new name!
Oh gosh, how many names and nicknames do I have? Tsk. Tsk.


My other nickname is neopets. All Ryan's fault. Wth right?


Btw, eyecandy time has been good. We've been progressing well.
Should I do a level up?
I'm not so sure. I'm not ready for anything yet because of you know what.


Speaking of you know what.
I've got a new keyboard because my keyboard is spoiled. And just last year, around this time, we changed the keyboard. Ohhh. Too sad.

We also bought my RHS around this time.

Oh. Yes, time flies doesn't it?




Enough emo time. I can't keep thinking of that. It will consume me soon and I can't let that happen.


Oh! I've completed watching Nightmare on Elm Street. Classic! :D

And DMC, the anime. I couldn't stop laughing like a kuku throughout the entire drama.
And my com has just finished DL-ing X Family episode 46-50! 5 more episodes left now! :D




Happy :D

See that ducky face? Does it remind you of anything?
Of the times we walked from one end to the other and when I'll act cute just because...
You'll never complain but you'll just smile to yourself. That silly smile of yours.




I want to run away. Now. Far far far away.

CUTE right?
Natalie must be puking now. 8DD

Haha. Webcam. Photo taken during uh, enterprise break? :D

Anyway, just to tell you. I'll be busy this week.
There's auditions, drama & a lot of stuff tomorrow.
Cheer on Wednesday.
Thursday, I'm hoping to chill out with the others.
Friday, maybe go home early to sleep away.


I need FBTs!
And I'm gonna get a blazer soon soon soon! :D

The fourth week of school starts tomorrow! I’m still planning out my busy schedule because... I just need to.

Anyway, the third week of school was by far one of the busiest weeks ever. I needed to stay back in school almost every day because of trainings, try-outs and other stuff. Busy busy busy me.

I forgot what I had on Monday already. Sorry for the STM.

I remember I had briefing for replug on Tuesday before meeting the usual four from Savanca. (Sze Him had rehearsals for SYF, Val PS-ed us & as usual Mandy cannot be contacted.)

Wednesday was REXAZ try-outs so I stayed in school until 9pm. This was the highlight of the week. I’ll touch on it later on.

Thursday, Christine, Bronza & I went to KFC where we bumped into Marcus & Kim! Christine & I then went to search for tights, sports bras & shorts. I also met Miro & Eja! Things to smile about! Also, at the end of the day, I met Joyce! Love love love!

Friday, was Soccer trials part one. Tina had to drag me there because last min I decided to not go. Anyway, a super long rant about this one. And, I doubt I’ll go for trials part two after going through stuff like that.

Anyway, let’s talk about the week.

On Monday, it was cognitive & problem solving. It was a good/bad day for me.

· Tina was not in school. No gossip partner

· Reeta’s lesson again! (My favourite faci!)

· I did almost everything today. From contributing ideas to doing the ppt slides to presenting (Nigel kept on listening to his YUI even during class in front of Reeta, Xiao Jie slept and did her own work. Azizah couldn’t help me much because she had a talk during second break. Jenny surprised me because she answered Reeta’s question pretty well but during ppt she wasn’t much help because of communication breakdown and I didn’t want to trouble her)

· There was a huge jam in the entrance because of temperature checking. Troublesome. I was late but that bought me time and gave an excuse to be late

· Oh! I met Ati in the morning. And this is so not related to school.

· I hope I get my A because if I don’t... I’m going to whack myself in the head. It’s a one-man show. You hear me talking throughout the entire lesson. This is whack!

Tuesday was Communications with Uma. I thought she wouldn’t be in class this week but she was in class! WTH?! She said that she would swap with another faci for that day but nooooo. As usual, her lesson was okay.

· She was fucking irritating. Duh, she asked about my thermometer for like 5 times and I had to show her my thermometer each time.

· It felt like the work was only done by me & Tina. (Daphne helped a little. Nigel was still listening to YUI. Xiao Jie was playing Viwawa.)

· I nearly got my A but the entire class was late for presentation so no choice, my grade dropped to B. She said that the whole class, will drop a grade.

· Ryan shot stupid questions again because I shot him a good question and he couldn’t fight back

· I nearly lost my cool in class.

· I was so caught up in the debate with Ryan and I mentioned important facts. And Uma, agreed with me & Bronza.

Wednesday with Gilbert for Enterprise.

· Fuck him.

· Fuck him.

· Fuck him.

· I think if my group lost marks, it is my fault.

· Fir knows about the gossip. He thought it was me but because I like somebody else... He guessed already.

· I hate Gilbert’s smile.

· Fucking cheeseballs. I seriously hope he fucks off.

· I laughed at norming because I was thinking of food.

Thursday was Science. With Eric Xie. (If I remember his name correctly.)

· He’s my second favourite faci

· He’s patient with the class

· He’s quite cute because he’s got this boyish face and a nice smile

· He’s quite lenient and he’s nice

· I did the graph wrongly but it’s alright because we admitted that we weren’t too sure about excel.

· Afiq was saying SL SL SL. And I pointed out that excel and SL are too different things. And Fir & some of the guys joked about it.

· Ryan’s smug face needed a bashing.

· Our RJ was the best ever! :D Describe yourself! How the fuck is that related to Science? Awesome huh?

Friday was Maths. And not with Mr blackface. Our China faci came back.

· Was able to do my maths sum with some of Albert’s help.

· I realised that my maths skills are pretty good.

· Poor Fir kena pinch by me.

· I used my YE skills for the PDT! Thank goodness for YE!

· I could do maths!

Well, that was what I learnt during communication. Look at the structure. I made it less wordy with all those key points and bullets. Would love to add in pictures but I have none now. ):

And if you noticed, I’ve been writing a lot about my class. Hardly been spending time with my midget family this week. For the entire week, I spend time during first break eating and time during my second break, accompanying Bronza, Tina and their friend, Kenneth to go hoo hoo. Christine thought I hoo hoo but nope. I don’t. Never ever tried before.

Let’s talk about Replug briefing.

· Kenneth was MIA that day.

· He wasn’t at either of the briefings. There were two rooms. Afiq & I met Aisyah, Haikal and co at another room. Actually we were at the back, when I told Afiq to move up front because I saw my friends.

· Everyone else in the room was malay. (More than half of the room!)

· I felt nervous

· I think that ABCDEFG was a total asshole. (Not telling you who)

· I had no idea what song to sing.

· I thought I saw somebody from my past at TRCC. (oh shat!)

Thank goodness after the briefing... Ami called and I got her to come to school.

We chatted until it was time to go to Yew Tee to meet the rest. And we saw Ati & her bf. HAHA.

Clique and I talked about everything! Told them about all my IGs and they told me I was mad. I’m not. Ami told me to sing hopelessly devoted to you. I guess that’s the song to sing because I always sing it when I karaoke. Oh & this song... I’m going to sing with emotions because I’ve done it a couple of times before. And I wonder if I can shout the song out because I always do that.

And I feel like ponning school on Tuesday to go K first because... I cannot sing at home. Damn irritating la. When you have auditions, you can’t sing at all. And I doubt they care if I get in or not.

The reason to why I join so many IGs is so obvious. It’s because I don’t want to be around them.

I gave up on trying anything at home already.

Anyway.

Cheer on Wednesday. My parents like don’t even care. My mom is like up to you la. So long as you don’t wear anything that reveals your body. And I’m like. You don’t care at all.

· Cheer was the best thing that happened

· Met a bunch of enthusiastic girls who are extremely friendly.

· Realised that big girls can fly!

· I tried out flying and I realised it was fun.

· Was the tallest girl. (Stupid because I had to do the base and had to stretch my legs really wide)

· My team members are cool. We are the Sha La La Las! Why? Because there are 2 Aishahs & 1 Elisha. Common thing between us are the Shas!

· I used a lot of my muscles & I’m sure that at the end, I’ll be very toned.

· Coach knows Junjie & used to be from Magnum Force.

· Rexaz doesn’t care if you were experienced or inexperienced, they just take you in

· To them, everybody is equal so we can all try out different positions.

· We played Dog & Bone.

- They asked for those who were having menses & I ran forward. (Only girl who ran)

- I dug out the bottle from underneath a girl and threw it back. (She was lying stomach down and I just put my hand below and just dug it out of her.)

I can’t say the same for my soccer try-outs.

I was freaking disappointed with the standard of the team and how the try-outs were conducted.

· There was obviously warm-ups and a couple of games but the damn coach only watched us play a two-sided match

· Right from the start, there was a two-sided match for us

· The experienced ones were kept to a side & the inexperienced ones, when to another corner.

· We were left to decide who plays what position on our own

· The inexperienced girls were not even taught how to kick properly

· Some of us don’t even know where to stand

· Some of us don’t know what the different positions do.

· We were playing against the team.

· We don’t even remember eachother’s names.

· In the first place, we should not even play a two-sided match on the whole soccer field. At least play half.

I’ve never heard of any try outs that straightaway start out with a two-sided match. Usually, try outs start with passing of the balls & how well we kick the ball etc. Where got two sided match one?

I don’t mind a two-sided match but I would prefer half the field first and at least assigning positions instead of anyhow because sometimes, we don’t even know how to play or who to pass to.

And btw, during a two-sided match. It doesn’t really gauge your talent. It’s more like teamwork etc. Especially if you don’t even have a chance to kick the ball during the game.

Overall, the week was okay. Kinda nervous for replug auditions because... I think there’s a lot of talents in RP and I’m just shy. And I feel my voice disappearing. ):

I think it’s time to go K to practice like crazy. :D

But now there’s nowhere to hide since you pushed my love aside.

10个月已经过去了。
Isn't it weird to still be pining for something that doesnt belong to you?
Why can't you run away from the past and move on fast?
It's just too hard

MAY 4th!

ヒロト! お誕生日おめでとうございます！









幸せな24歳の誕生日！




3年以来、私は最初にバンドに耳を傾け＆ファンになりました。バンドをサポートするのは3年と私はまだ今日までは、バンドが大好きです。


多 忙なため、私はあなたとしている少年たちの残りの部分を読んで知っている場合は終了します本当に分からないよ。大変ご迷惑を翻訳しようとしていたので本当 にできるようにお読みいただければ幸いにこのエントリを書いてみませんか？私は過ちをお掛けしてすみません。私は日本語を知らない私は通訳を使った。


私 は実際にはバンドを継続すると私は永遠にあなたをサポートする音楽が大好きです。バンドは私にインスピレーションされているとあなた方には特に。あなたは いつも私のアイドル＆私のお気に入りのギタリストしている。笑顔を作る私の歌を書く。いつ私は悲しいよ、私はいつもあなたの曲を聴くと私は生きて再び感じ る。


私はすぐにシンガポールに来てほしい！ここであなたのファンを見て愛を実行する！いつかは本当なる私のこの夢を見てほしい。今のところ、私はそこまで節約旅行なんだよ！待ちきれないよ！




誕生日おめでとう！ 自分の注意を払ってくださいと一緒に素敵な音楽との書き込みを続行！ 男の子たちの残りの部分に自分の愛をパスして！




あなたを愛している！

P.S 不良言語を使用してすみません。